blissdom — Giving Up on Perfect

On getting “Oh, honey”-ed at Blissdom

March 27, 2013 By Mary @ Giving Up on Perfect 53 Comments

You know how sometimes you leave a conversation, replaying it in your head until it becomes something much bigger than it really was? And how the only way to get better perspective is to dictate the entire conversation to a good friend, including facial expressions, voice intonations and awkward pauses of all parties involved? And how you most often get one of two responses?

You know, either, “Oh, please,” (as in, “That wasn’t bad at all! You’re fine. FINE.”) or “Oh, honey,” (as in, “That was bad. BAD. I am cringing for you right now. Really, you should probably hide out for a day or twelve. That was…I just…oh, honey.”)?

I got “Oh, honey”-ed at Blissdom last week.

Before I dive into this shameful tale, though, I should remind you of my sad tendency to get WEIRD when I meet famous (or blog famous) people at Blissdom. I cried (CRIED!) the first time I met a famous blogger, and the only thing I could spit out when I met Harry Connick, Jr. was, “Thank you.” (Which, for the record, is still better than what I was thinking, which was, “You have surprisingly small hands!” Admittedly, though, “thank you” is extremely lame.)

But in my defense, I have met other famous people without crying, babbling, hyperventilating or otherwise acting inappropriately. Just so you know.

That may not have been the case at Blissdom this year…

Let me tell you what happened.

Oh wait, you need more back story. FINE. I’ll tell you the whole thing. (Why do you make me do this?)

I started reading Stuff Christians Like early on in my blog life. I’ve read all the books Jon Acuff has written, pretty much all his blog posts on both of his blogs, and I’ve seen him speak – both in videos and in person. I think he’s hilarious and honest and alternately inspiring and convicting on Serious Wednesday.

So basically, I’m a big fan.

And that’s okay, right? That’s not embarrassing or weird. I’m allowed to be a fan of a writer. Right?

Here’s where it starts getting embarrassing…

So last year, Jon Acuff spoke at Blissdom. Right before his keynote I was talking to my friend Dedra, who was on staff with the conference and worked with all the speakers. I said, “Oh, I’m so excited for this! I’m a huge fan of Jon Acuff!” (or something reasonable like that). And SHE said, “Well, come on! I’ll introduce you!”

You guys. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. But I PANICKED. I totally freaked out! I said, [not at all] calmly, “No, I couldn’t. No. I…just…no. NO. I’ve got to go. I…um…bye!”

I DON’T KNOW WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME.

Later that morning I managed to get it together long enough to stand in line to meet him and have his book, Quitter, signed. I tried desperately to think of something funny to say when I got up to the front of the line, but while that’s not normally THAT difficult, the funny escaped me.

I don’t remember what I said, but it must have been some kind of awesome. Because when I met him again this year, he said, “Have we met before?”

Sadly, it was Harry Connick all over again, because all I had to say in response to that was, “Yeah.”

Meanwhile, my friend and roommate Jill carried on an entire conversation with him. An interesting, funny conversation. While I stood there, awkwardly. Oh so awkwardly.

This isn’t actually the “oh, honey” part, though. (But wait! There’s more!)

The following night was Girls Night Out, a party at the resort’s club-slash-trendy-restaurant. As most of these parties are, this GNO was loud and crowded and, at least temporarily, home to many more people than chairs. Lots of people had a ton of fun, but these types of events aren’t really my thing.

Nevertheless, I was glad Jill convinced me to go to the party. I’d shoved myself into a horribly binding combination of too-small tights, spanx and faux-wool skirt, and though I might’ve been overly warm (and unable to sit down comfortably, if you must know), I sure looked cute!

I got some food, enjoyed a very tasty ConAgra-tini (or two), and heard Amber Riley from Glee tear.it.up on stage. I caught up with some old friends and even managed to make a new one (not so easy when music is pounding so loud you can FEEL IT INSIDE YOUR BODY). And then I was pretty much done.

Before I could convince Jill to go back to the hotel – or at least give me my room key and phone, because she lost the who’s-going-to-carry-a-purse-tonight lottery – we noticed that Jon Acuff was at the party. She, of course, didn’t hesitate and went over to talk to him again. I did not.

But then – then! – I decided I couldn’t keep being so ridiculous. So I walked over to him to chat for a minute. I waited for a couple other people to finish up and then said hello.

THIS IS WHERE THINGS REALLY STARTED GOING WRONG.

You guys. You know how sometimes you can say things and they can be taken two different ways? As in, a normal way and…um…a BAD way? Right. Yes. This is how our conversation went:

Me: Hi there! I just wanted to say hello. I really enjoyed your session this morning.
Him: Oh, thanks. Have we met before?
Me: Heh heh. That’s what you said last night.
Him: *awkward stare*
Me: I mean, haha! I’m just kidding. Well, you DID say that last night, but I was just kidding. Ummmm…
Him: Oh, right! You were with the girl who said I was from The Voice, right?
Me: Yeah! She’s so funny. She’s my roommate.
Him: Yeah, and she [he proceeded to list off several personal facts about Jill then].
Me: Um, yes. Gosh. You guys are totally best friends now! I thought she was my best friend!
Him: Well, I hate to break it to you…
Me: *totally normal laughter*
Him: So, what do people do now? Go back to the hotel?
Me: Well, I want to go back to the hotel!
Him: *more awkward staring*
Me: I mean, it’s loud and crowded and…well, it was nice to meet you! Bye!

Now you might be thinking about saying, “Oh, please.” As in, that conversation wasn’t weird at all and I’m probably exaggerating because that’s what I do and who cares anyway and hey, at least he remembered you.

But I told a friend about the whole conversation right after it happened, word for word, and you know what she said?

You guessed it: “Oh, HONEY.”

Lots of people have written great posts about all the things they learned or enjoyed at Blissdom. I’m planning on sharing a bit of that, too. But I couldn’t even begin to process all that good stuff until I told you this story. Because, really, if there were a how-to guide for giving up on perfect when meeting someone you really admire, I’m pretty sure I NAILED IT.

The how-to guide. Not…OH MY WORD, MAKE IT STOP.

Have you ever met someone famous? How did you react?
{Please. Feel free to top my story of humiliation.}Photo source

Filed Under: Entertainment & Pop Culture Tagged With: best of, blissdom

Take the comfy shoes, leave the pointy heels.

March 7, 2012 By Mary @ Giving Up on Perfect 12 Comments

If you’ve ever been to a blogging conference, you know that one of the most fun perks is the swag. Sponsors of the event fill up registration bags with gifts and hand out products and trinkets at their booths. I suppose this happens at other conferences, too, but I’ve never received sponsor gifts as great as the ones I get at Blissdom!

A few of my favorites this year included an automatic (“magic,” as we’re calling it in our house) soap dispenser from Simple Human, a copy of The Lorax, and a plastic cup with lid and straw from Crocs. (I know. Who gets excited about a plastic cup? Right. I do.)

I also got a couple t-shirts, a couple reusable canvas bags, and a bag of Hershey Bliss chocolate eggs that I may or may not have devoured. But far and away, my all-time favorite sponsor gift EVER was a pair of Dr. Scholl’s sneakers from Famous Footwear.

First of all, getting a free pair of shoes is awesome, am I right? I don’t really need any other reasoning for this. But I have it anyway! The shoes are cute and, even more important to me, they are super comfy. And, boy, did I need comfy shoes after being on my feet for several hours and then cramming my toes into pointy heels for the Girls’ Night Out party at Blissdom!

After working on the Blissdom staff this year, I know the conference would not exist if it weren’t for the amazing sponsors who are so very generous to the attendees. From cookies and yogurt to greeting cards and wrapping paper, the sponsors of Blissdom gave the best gifts this year.

The only downside was getting it all to fit in my bags! (And saying a sad goodbye to the remaining chocolate eggs that wouldn’t fit in my carry-on . . .)

Have you ever gotten a cool gift at a conference?

Top photo taken by my new friend Nancy Doud. Second photo taken by the amazing Casey Mullins.

Filed Under: Blogging & Social Media Tagged With: blissdom

What I Learned from Scott Stratten’s Keynote

February 10, 2011 By Mary @ Giving Up on Perfect 8 Comments

After reading through my notes from Scott Stratten’s keynote presentation at Blissdom, I realized why I couldn’t stop overusing the word “awesome” for a few days. I blame Scott. Or, as most people know him, @unmarketing.

No matter what you call him, he got me thinking about The Awesome, and I haven’t stopped since.

I’ll tell you more about what this means to me (and my blog) next week, but for now, I wanted to share the best tidbits of Scott’s highly entertaining, beautifully organized and thoroughly engaging presentation.

The man literally spoke in tweets, pausing and winking after each one, but he didn’t need to. His stories and illustrations – not to mention his eye-catching graphics on the big screen and his quirky Canadian accent – were enough to draw us in and keep us enthralled (for lack of a less dramatic yet still accurate word) for the good part of an hour. Throughout his presentation, the audience literally gasped, moaned, laughed and squealed. This was, in addition to the most practical teaching I heard at Blissdom, the best presentation I’ve seen in a very long time.

Now, for the things I took away from Scott’s keynote:

You’re not “only” anything. You’re not “just” something. (e.g. Not JUST a mommy blogger.)
To have good customer service, you only have to be average because everyone else sucks.
Marketing isn’t hard. Social media isn’t hard. Just care. Care about people.
People don’t spread MEH. People don’t spread okay. People spread AWESOME.
Why we spread information hasn’t changed. How we spread it has.
Only blog when you have something awesome to say!
It is not my job to tell my audience how to consume my product. I just want them to consume it. (This came from someone he knows on Twitter, but I didn’t catch who said it originally.)
Create the awesome, THEN add the SEO stuff.
Social media doesn’t make anything better. It just amplifies.
I’d like to go back to when it (communication) was called TALKING.

Bonus takeaways:

Make your site mobile-enabled.
Only 1-3% blog readers ever comment.
75% of @unmarketing’s tweets are replies.

Okay, I know I’ve raved here, so you’re probably wondering if anyone could be as good as all that. But you know me. Have you ever heard me RAVE about a speaker? Having taught one full semester of speech at a university, I am extremely picky when it comes to evaluating speakers. (Just ask my students. The ones that hated me so much and so loudly that I quit teaching. AHEM. That would be what we call a story for another time!)

In addition to that piece of baggage, I mean background, there’s also the fact that I’ve seen “famous” social media “gurus” speak before. And they just annoyed me. Scott did not annoy me. (And again. You know me – and how easily I’m annoyed!)

Finally, much as I loved Blissdom and all the fun hanging-out-with-friends time I had, I didn’t feel that the conference’s value was in the sessions. That bummed me out, because I’m a big nerd who likes to learn. But this presentation? It was chock full of practical tips and down-to-earth advice. In short, I loved it.

And now, just to prove that little line about being a nerd, I must ask you: Does anyone else think of the book, How to Eat Fried Worms, when they hear the phrase “chock full”?

Image by GoodNCrazy. This post will be linked to [next week's] Top Ten Tuesday at Oh Amanda, What I Learned This Week at From Inmates to Playdates and Works for Me Wednesday at We Are THAT Family.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: blissdom, blissdom 2011, keynote speaker, scott stratten, unmarketing

How to Avoid Post-Conference Slump

February 2, 2011 By Mary @ Giving Up on Perfect 15 Comments

Four days ago, I arrived home. I was full of ideas and inspiration, and I couldn’t wait to hug my kiddo (and husband).

Today, I feel dull and irritated, completely unmotivated and uninspired. And I actually put my darling daughter to bed half an hour early just to end the whining on Snow Day #2.

It’s official: I’m in a post-conference slump.

My house is a mess, I’ve yet to implement a single new idea I learned last week, and I have managed to consume an obscene number of cookies that were supposed to go to church on Monday. Before the snowstorm of the century closed the church, that is.

The funny thing is I actually started writing this post before leaving town last week. Because I suspect I’m not the only one who comes home from a conference, business trip or vacation feeling less than rested and refreshed.

Too bad I haven’t followed my own advice. Just in case I can help you, here are a few tips. Don’t be like me. Avoid the post-conference slump next time you go out of town.

Get your rest. This actually starts before you even leave home. Don’t stay up late packing. (Don’t be like me.) Avoid super early flights if you can. That way, when you don’t get your regular seven hours or so – because who really sleeps well when sharing a room with virtual strangers (or, in the case of a blogging conference, virtual friends) and partaking in late-night parties? I mean, networking events.

Also – get some rest after you get home, too. Take a nap. Go to bed early. Or both, if you’re really lucky.

Stay hydrated. Hotels – and some conferences – are so terribly dry! Drink as much and often as possible while you’re there – and I’m only talking about water. You’ll probably need to drink more water than normal after getting home, too.

Take good notes. You might think something is so clever or poignant or funny or helpful that you’ll never forget it. But you will. By the time you get home, your brain will be mush and you’ll need all the help you can get remembering all the incredible information you just received. So whether it’s on your laptop, a shiny new iPad or good, old-fashioned pen and paper, write it down.

Download on someone. As soon as you can, get the words out. You’ve been saving them up during the whole trip, right? Your observations, the surprises, the disappointments, your favorite parts, your new favorite person, your least favorite speaker? Tell someone. Now. Before you explode.

Write a review or summary or recap. Difficult though it may be (for some of us), put it on paper now. Whether it’s minutes for a business meeting or a blog post about a social media conference, get it wrapped up as soon as possible. You’ll feel better when you do. Believe me.

Follow-up with your new friends. You’ve got a stack of business cards sitting next to your suitcase, don’t you? (I’m kidding. I know you already unpacked and put away your suitcase, because you’re not like me.) Pull them up and get started shooting those new friends an e-mail. You’ll be more likely to remember all those new faces if you follow up now, and besides, who won’t like getting a message about how much you enjoyed meeting them?

Fill out the evaluation form. Whether your conference was amazing, awful or somewhere in between, take the time to fill out the evaluation form and share your insights with the people in charge. It’s one more way to organize your thoughts – and it’s constructive, too. Just be nice, okay? Even if you have some suggestions for improvement, remember how much work – and heart – likely went into planning the event, perfect or not.

Make a to-do list – with a timeline. You can’t implement every new idea you heard right away. And it’s tempting to give into the overwhelming nature of all the inspiration and education by pulling the covers back over your head and, oh I don’t know, not blogging for a week. Or by ignoring your child who just wants her mother to entertain her during another snow day, isthattoomuchtoask, in favor of frantically applying every new tip you heard and then some.

Hypothetically speaking, of course.

So, again, don’t be like me. Make a list of all the new things you want to do and give yourself some time. And finally . . .

Remember that you can’t do it all. And there WILL be another conference, seminar, retreat or class.

And with that, I’m off to bed. Because as of tomorrow, I’m taking this advice and getting myself back in gear. After all, what choice do I have? All the cookies are gone.

Photo credit.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: blissdom, blissdom 2011, conferences, wednesdays at work

10 Reasons I Needed Kleenex at Blissdom

February 1, 2011 By Mary @ Giving Up on Perfect 30 Comments

Writing recaps of my favorite TV shows? Piece of cake. Writing recaps of blog conferences? Crazy difficult. Finally giving myself permission to read everyone else’s recap because mine is published? Priceless.

Or, at least it will be, once I get through this post!

I’m not sure why I find it so difficult to recap a trip like this. Maybe because most conferences are jam-packed full of the amazing, the terrifying and everything in between. Or, maybe it’s because when I hit “publish,” I’ll have to admit that the event is finally over.

And that means I have to unpack my suitcases.

Whatever the reason, I could not bring myself to write this quickly or keep it short. So, for all of you wonderful people who did not go to the Blissdom Conference last week, I apologize. And promise to move on to normal life tomorrow. Until then, though . . .

Image by sippycupmom

Kleenex was my generous sponsor for Blissdom, but even if they hadn’t been, I still would have needed the cute little box of tissues that they included in my registration bag (and as many Softness Worth Sharing boxes that I could convince people to send me!). Happy tears, sad tears, overwhelmed tears and crazy tears – I had them all.

Here are the 10 reasons (in addition to their incredible sponsorship!) that I needed Kleenex at Blissdom.

1. The Flash Mob: As I whispered to my friend Hillary as we walked to a secret rehearsal, “I’ve been keeping something from you.” Yes, it’s true. I was part of a flash mob at Blissdom! You can count on hearing more about this in the future, because it was The Most Amazing Thing EVER. But for now, just know that I really did cry – from being overwhelmed and giddy, from the adrenaline, from wanting to do it all over again, and from watching Alli’s reaction to the whole thing.

[Wanna see it? Here's a video. I'm wearing a teal sweater, and you can see me – and my super trendy and so-not-like-me fingerless gloves – on the left side of the screen. Briefly.]

2. Laughing with my roommates: As in, laughing until we cried. I will admit I was worried about cramming four women (and all our STUFF) into one room, but I had the best time with my roomies! Hillary, Kate and Kathy were so laidback, so down-to-earth, and so much fun. I really do love them.

3. Spewing hot chocolate: I don’t even remember what was so funny. But at one point during my breakfast with the (in)courage team, I literally laughed so hard that I sprayed hot chocolate out of my mouth and all over my hand. Thankfully, Dawn was the only witness. But I really could’ve used a Kleenex or two at that moment!

4. No dinner plans on Thursday. Even though I’m a pretty outgoing person, I don’t like cocktail parties. Or, really, any party where I have to balance my food, drink, camera and purse while shouting at strangers in an effort to get to know them. So after enduring the Wednesday night party, I decided I wasn’t up for another one the following evening. I wanted to find some like-minded friends and have a relaxed, non-shouty dinner in some comfy clothes before heading to the (in)courage party. But after texting and tweeting several people, I didn’t find a single taker.

It wasn’t personal. And, in a few cases, it wasn’t on purpose. But I was still sad. I didn’t full out cry or anything, but having a tissue on hand never hurts.

5. I just can’t get enough (of my favorite people). I loved every minute I spent with my roommates, the (in)courage team and my Sisterchicks. But, of course, I wanted more. I also wish so much that I’d had more time to spend with Jo-Lynne, Gussy, Lisa, Leigh, Holley, Stephanie, Lindsey and, most of all, Shelly.

On top of that, I didn’t get to spend any time Sarah, Rachel, Jennifer, Jenny or Emily – all amazing women who I’d love to know better.

Adorable photo of cupcakes (and Amanda) by Secret Agent Mama

6. Passing up all the good food. Talk about bad timing. Blissdom landed smack dab in the middle of my second week back on Weight Watchers. I’m determined to make it work this time, though, so even though the cupcakes and ice cream and chocolate and millions of other goodies were hard to resist, I did it anyway. Mostly. Enough to see a 2.2 lb. loss on Monday morning!

Great photos of great friends by Staci

7. Sharing and listening with real friends. More than once during the conference, I found myself in deep conversations with sweet friends. And, if you know me at all, you know deep conversation equals crying for me. Thanks for pretending not to notice I’m a big bawl baby, Kathy, Amanda, Mandi, Staci, Christine, Tricia and Jen!

8. Saying goodbye. As the Boyz II Men so wisely said years ago, it’s so hard to say goodbye to yesterday. Or to Blissdom. Or, more accurately, friends you only get to hug once a year. When it came time to say goodbye to the incredible Lisa-Jo, I truly did cry. I’m not sure why I got so emotional (and yes, I did feel a little stalkerish and weird), but I did.

I hate goodbyes. I don’t even want to talk about it here, because knowing me, I’ll start crying again. (And my Kleenex box is all the way across the room.)

Actual photographers USING their cameras at Blissdom. Photo by Secret Agent Mama.

9. I am neither a photo nor a queen. Discuss. For those of you who haven’t been here since the beginning, you may not know that I originally went by “Photoqueen” on this blog. For those of you who’ve never attended an event with me, in person, you may not know that I’m ridiculous about snapping a thousand pictures, making sure I capture each and every moment. But even if you don’t know those things, please believe me when I say that I cannot believe I only took one photo at Blissdom. ONE! That’s all! Crazy. (And sad. Crazy sad, really.)

10. There’s no place like home. Despite my exhaustion and a slightly bumpy ride, I could hardly contain my excitement as my plane descended into KCI. I was so ready to be home and with my two favorite people, and seeing them walk down the hallway as I waited at baggage claim was the best sight of the weekend!

Not every moment at Blissdom required a tissue. Because I just couldn’t contain myself, here are 10 more of my favorite moments from the conference:

The keynote speakers – Brene Brown and Scott Stratten – were AMAZING. Not something I usually say about speakers. I’m kind of picky. But they were both SO good. (Photo of Scott Stratten (with unexplained wand) by Rachel, A Southern Fairytale.)
The (in)courage breakfast – and meeting the rest of the DaySpring team – was like coming home. In an enormous, beautiful hotel. (Photo from the amazing Dawn, My Home Sweet Home.)
Getting a manicure and a massage never hurts. And I got both.
Jessie came up for dinner on Friday, and it was great to see her (and her adorable baby boy)!
After hearing Scott Stratten speak, I told him how much my entire table enjoyed his presentation. I told him it was engaging but practical, and you just can’t say that about most speakers. He very sincerely said he appreciated that – and promptly made my whole night.
Playing telephone while sitting in a circle with a bunch of grown women may sound silly. And, I guess it is. But I tell you what, it was fun and made me laugh hysterically.
Meeting people who said they knew me – or my blog – gave me all sorts of warm fuzzies. But so did the people I met who I knew, especially when they were gracious and kind, sometimes even hugging me.
I loved meeting Dee, Angie, Matthew and Myra, seeing Ruthanne and Edie, and hanging out with Dawn.
The hotel was sold out on Saturday night, so I had to find a place to stay. Christine was moving into a new house THAT DAY, but still offered her (new) guest room and air mattress. Spending the afternoon and evening with her family was definitely a highlight of my trip!

10. And did I mention I WAS IN A FLASH MOB??? (Photo of Jana, our incredible flash mob choreographer, by Rachel.)

Okay, I think that’s it. For now. No, really. I’m finished. I think.

If you went to Blissdom, what was your favorite part? This post will be linked to the Blissdom Recap Carnival at Musings of a Housewife and Top Ten Tuesday at OhAmanda.

Thank you again to Kleenex for sponsoring my trip. You are not just America’s softest tissue; you’re my favorite tissue. And that’s saying a lot, considering just how much I really cry. (Seriously. Did you read this post?)