Book Review: Tour de Force by Elizabeth White

*This review is part of The Blog Tour Spot.*

You know how at the end of every dance movie, there’s a big emotional dance scene where everything just falls into place?

Well, at the end of Tour de Force by Elizabeth White, there’s a . . . oh no, you aren’t going to trick me like that. I’m not going to tell you what happens at the end!

I will tell you that the book has dancing in it. Dancing that I appreciate so much more because of my love of So You Think You Can Dance. Dancing that has a whole new element because of the main characters’, well, character.

I’d read books by Elizabeth White before and thought they were pretty cute. Not too fluffy and pretty fun reads. Tour de Force was about the same, and even featured characters mentioned in previous books or related to characters from previous books.

(Although I’m not about to admit how far into the book I was before I realized that. It had been a couple years since I read one of White’s novels. And I read a lot of books, okay?! How can I remember every single character? . . . Okay, so I was more than halfway through the book when it hit me.)

I did feel that Tour de Force was a bit heavier, somewhat deeper than the other books by White. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I enjoyed reading about dance, and seriously, having watched so much dance on TV and in movies over the past few years really fueled my imagination and colored my perspective on the story.

The dialogue had a few clunky spots. One that stood out in particular was when a character used the word “eldest.” I’ve just never heard anyone say that in real life. Then again, I think the character who said that was British, so it’s possible that the British say it all the time. I wouldn’t really know. (Unless I heard it from Nigel Lythgoe, who is British and a dancer, which makes this random SYTYCD reference oh-so relevant.)

Some readers may find the resolution of the story a bit far-fetched, but I believe the author is trying to stretch our faith and open our minds a bit. What happens to each of the characters, I think, is quite possible and certainly a bit thought-provoking.

Or maybe it’s just an overly simple solution to a sticky story arc. You can decide for yourself, but for me, I liked Tour de Force. Here’s the summary:

Gillian Kincade is a soloist with Ballet New York, a sought-after guest artist, and a committed Christian. Though she may be an anomaly in the world of dance, Gilly believes her devotion to God isn’t compromised by following her dreams. Then she meets Jacob Ferrar.

Jacob is the brilliant young artistic director of the Birmingham Ballet Theatre and a born-again Christian. When he offers Gillian the lead in his latest ballet she accepts, knowing it won’t necessarily further her career, but it will touch her soul.

On the chaotic road to opening night, Gilly and Jacob develop a deep professional respect for each other and begin to fall in love. Then their brilliant first performance is destroyed by a terrible accident, and suddenly both must face an uncertain future. Together, they dance the fine line between personal vision and God’s will, listening for the guidance of the Father’s heart.

Do you like dance movies? What about Christian fiction? Tell me what you’re reading and/or watching this summer!

But wait, there’s more.

Something strange has happened. And I'm not talking about the interview I heard this morning of Paris Hilton wishing she could be more like Princess Diana. Or something.

No. I'm talking about a dessert Mark has found that I quite enjoy – one that does not have an ounce of chocolate in it.

You heard me. None. That means said dessert is not and does not contain brownies or chocolate chip cookies or chocolate pudding or chocolate cake or a yellow cupcake with chocolate frosting or graham crackers with chocolate frosting or a chocolate pudding pop or a chocolate cake in a mug thing.

[Side note: Oh my goodness, not that you need further proof of my nerd-dom, but if you keep watching the Bill Cosby videos on that link, it will show a commercial for a Speak and Spell. I loved my Speak and Spell! I wish I still had one today! Okay, maybe not. But I can’t wait to get Annalyn started on nerdy toys like that.]

Back to our regular programming now. Back to dessert.

Oh yes, this mysterious non-chocolate dessert even contains . . . wait for it . . . fruit!

I know. I couldn’t believe it myself.

This summer, we are really loving Blue Bunny’s Double Peach Ice Cream. Usually fruit-flavored food has that not-necessarily-bad-but-not-necessarily-good artificial taste. But not this tasty treat! Honestly, it tastes like good vanilla ice cream (not the cheapo kind we usually buy) with fresh peaches.

I’m not even kidding.

[Also, side note #2, I’m not saying this because I got the ice cream for free or anything. It’s just good and we like it. Not that we wouldn’t take free ice cream. Because we would. Oh, we would.]

So, if you’re looking for a new summer sweet or if you happen to be one of those people who prefers fruity desserts over chocolate ones, I say try this one out. And, not to be overly dramatic or late-night informercial-ish, but you should probably do it soon. Mark says it’s a limited time special or something, so who knows how long it will be in stores.

And if you call now, they’ll throw in a set of Ginsu knives, too.

What's your favorite summertime treat? Or, if you like, dessert in general?

This post is linked to Things I Love Thursday.

Don’t make me pull this car over.

Sometimes Annalyn is naughty. Actually . . . these days, she’s naughty fairly often. Her most recent misbehavior of choice is spitting. And screaming is a pretty close second.

We’ve been having what you might call “discipline issues” at our house.

Since Friday, though, I’ve found that – surprise, surprise – immediate and consistent consequences really make an impression.

The thing that I’m having to get over is that handing out immediate and consistent consequences is darned inconvenient!

Don’t worry. I’m getting over it. So over it that I have, in fact, pulled the car over, gotten out and walked around to her side, and dealt with the problem.

It’s not fun, but it seems to be working. This week (so far . . .) she has been sooo super sweet! I had to work late tonight, and when I got home, all she wanted to do was hug me and kiss me and sit on my lap.

Now that’s something I could stand more of!!

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On another note, Monday night was the last chat for our Me, Myself & Lies study. I hope those of you who participated got something out of it. I really enjoyed our chats and hope to visit with you ladies more!

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And on yet another topic, Monday night was also the day that Mark broke his healthy (or, at least, uninjured) streak. He fell at work and badly sprained his ankle. We know for sure it’s not broken because he got the privilege of sitting in the emergency room for six hours. Putting him home at 4:30 a.m. That’s in the morning!

Poor guy. At least they gave him crutches this time.

(Yes, this time. He may or may not make a habit of getting injured . . .)

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How’s your week going?

Play on, playa.

Clearly, I've always known good music. Here I am, playing the bass clarinet, circa 1990. No, it's not a saxophone. Yes, my pants are tight-rolled.

Mark said it doesn’t count as “knowing the words” if I can only say things like “play on, playa” and “hey-ah, hey-ah, hey-AHHH” in rhythm.

Whatev. You know I’m down with Dre.

What? You didn’t? Huh. Well, as a little party favor for our 30th birthday party slash reunion, Smitty and I decided to make mix tapes. On CDs.

I was all for a mix of top hits from 1978 and 1979. But Smitty overruled me and said songs from 1997 (the year we graduated) would be better.

That was until she discovered ’97 was the year of both MMMBop and the Spice Girls. It was also before I discovered that that catchy ditty, “Mouth,” is actually a dirty song.

However, we persevered. Because for our friends, only the best.

And by “the best,” I mean lots of cream cheese and pop tunes from the late 90s.

Now that I’ve whipped you into a frenzy of curiosity, I’ll reveal the songs that made Saturday’s playlist. Don’t even tell me these don’t take you back. Back all the way to . . . 1997.

• No Diggity (Blackstreet & Dr. Dre)
• You Make Me Wanna… (Usher)
• I’ll Be Missing You (Puffy Daddy & Faith Evans)
• Return of the Mack (Mark Morrison)
• How Bizarre (OMC)
• MMMBop (Hanson)
• Where Do You Go (No Mercy)
• The Impression That I Get (The Mighty Mighty Bosstones)
• B*tch (Meredith Brooks)
• Criminal (Fiona Apple)
• The Freshmen (The Verve Pipe)
• Semi-Charmed Life (Third Eye Blind)
• If You Could Only See (Tonic)
• One Headlight (The Wallflowers)
• All For You (Sister Hazel)
• Building a Mystery (Sarah McLachlan)
• Secret Garden (Bruce Springsteen)

After we put together this tape CD – but before I realized I’d exhausted my iTunes budget – we looked up top songs of 1978. Just for kicks.

Because when you get to the ripe old age of 30, that’s what you do on a Friday night for kicks.

It was a good year for music. But what I found later that night was that the real year for good tunes was 1989. As I said to Mark, “Your brother is so lucky! He graduated in the year that has all my favorite songs!”

Because I’m pretty sure my brother-in-law jammed to Paula Abdul, Tiffany and yes, New Kids on the Block.

Not really. But maybe Big Mama can appreciate this list, as she, too, apparently came of age in that wonderful musical year.

In case you aren’t as familiar with the sounds of ’89, here are my top 20 faves (in no particular order, because I’m writing this late at night and I have no brain power left for that sort of thing). And yes, I am cheating and linking this up to OhAmanda’s Top Ten Tuesday.

• Look Away (Chicago)
• My Prerogative (Bobby Brown)
• Straight Up (Paula Abdul)
• Miss You Much (Janet Jackson)
• Girl You Know Its True (Milli Vanilli)
• Right Here Waiting (Richard Marx)
• Lost In Your Eyes (Debbie Gibson)
• The Look (Roxette)
• I'll Be There For You (Bon Jovi)
• You Got It (The Right Stuff) (New Kids On The Block)
• Eternal Flame (The Bangles)
• Wild Thing (Tone Loc)
• When I See You Smile (Bad English)
• If I Could Turn Back Time (Cher)
• Buffalo Stance (Neneh Cherry)
• Bust A Move (Young M.C.)
• Love Shack (B-52's)
• Cherish (Madonna)
• Heaven (Warrant)
• She Drives Me Crazy (Fine Young Cannibals)

What’s your favorite year for music?

For more than just bagels.

Apparently, cream cheese is a necessity for every appetizer known to man. Or, at least, known to me.

On Thursday night, Smitty and I took a field trip to the grocery store. I had my list of ingredients and a couple extra recipes for good measure. (Smitty had conveniently accidentally forgotten her wallet at home, so she wasn’t able to buy her ingredients and supplies.)

When I realized just how many bricks of cream cheese I needed, I had to laugh. And flash back to this post of BooMama’s. Look, if BooMama says it’s good stuff, you know it to be true, right?

I decided to forgo the fruit dip, mainly because buying three different kinds of fruit and cutting it up just seemed so . . . expensive . . . and time-consuming. (Only the best for my friends, you know.) But even so, I bought three blocks of cream cheese.

I have no idea how many rectangular foil packs of goodness were sacrificed for Smitty’s cheesecake squares. But let me tell you right now, it was well worth it. After Mark ate his leftover pieces on Sunday, he got himself off the couch, looked at me and said, “Okay, I’m going to drive to Smitty’s house now and get the rest of the leftovers.”

Smitty lives about an hour away. He did not drive there. But oh, he was tempted.

Anyway, this post is supposed to be all about the cooking and the recipes and the yummy treats we gorged snacked on Saturday night. So here you go. To compliment the awesome hamburgers that Mark grilled and the rocking mix tape Smitty and I burned, we had tortilla rolls and MexiDip. (And veggies and brownies and beans and chips and . . . ugh, no wonder I thought I was going to die from a stomachache by the time I fell into bed that night.)

And if you’re wondering where the photos are, you can just keep on wondering. After taking about a trillion pictures Friday night and almost missing my daughter’s first real steps (can I get a WOO-HOO!?!), I decided to put the camera down and just live on Saturday. Imagine that. (But don’t get used to it. I am sure it won’t become a habit or anything.)

Tortilla Rolls

10 burrito-sized flour tortillas
1 block (8 oz.) cream cheese
8 oz. sour cream
1 cup finely shredded cheddar (that’s fancy shredded for those of you who, like me, hate grating)
1 small can green chilies (or 2/3 of a large can, if you live on the edge)

Mix up all ingredients except tortillas (because that would be weird). Spread on tortillas and roll up. Refrigerate the 10 rolls overnight or at least for a few hours. Then slice into pinwheels. Eat the ends, because nobody wants to see those on your platter. Serve with salsa.

This is a recipe that can be a little healthier, although nothing will help you if you eat 47 in one sitting. I may possibly speak from experience. Low-fat tortillas, cream cheese, sour cream and even cheddar lessen the damage. Although, for the record, I went full fat this time. Unh-huh.

MexiDip

2 blocks (8 oz.) cream cheese (yes, I said 2)
1 can Mexicorn
1 small can green chilies
1 can Rotel (diced tomatoes with green chilies)
1 can chopped olives (I don’t love olives, so didn’t use the whole can. Just couldn’t do it.)

Mix it all up and refrigerate overnight. Make sure you drain the corn and Rotel. It will look disgusting, but I guarantee your guests will ask for the recipe. And hog the bowl. Mine did. And, in fact, that was my response when I ate this for the first (second, third and fourth) time at my cousin Sondra’s house. It may look ugly, but it is tasty.

Have you tried any new recipes lately? For a few to add to your cookbook, check out Rachel’s Mouthwatering Monday at A Southern Fairytale. And this post will be linked to Friday Family Recipes, as well as Tasty Tuesday (which is hosting The Finer Things in Life's Bloggy Progressive Dinner!).

Photo by House of Sims

Saturday Review: business cards

Since you all asked (well, two of you asked), here are my new bloggy business cards. I ordered them from FedEx online (formerly known as Kinko's), and even though the site said I'd receive them in seven business days, I got them early on Friday.

I don't love them, to be honest. The paper is not that great, and the size seems off. The design is pretty straightforward - the same image from my blog header, my name, e-mail address, blog address and Twitter address.

The smallest amount I could order was 250. I told Mark that I sure didn't need that many. He kindly said, "I don't know. I'm sure all those big bloggers gave away a lot of cards when they were starting."

So optimistic, that husband of mine.

Have a good weekend! I'm off to finish cleaning the house for my party!

Welcome to the Party!

Oldies music makes me smile . . . and throw jazz hands in the air. I think it has something to do with three years in show choir and a director who loved the oldies.

And the smokes. That man could hardly manage a 30-minute bus trip to competition without going into withdrawal. But I suppose that’s another story.

Today, Robin and Jo-Lynne are hosting a Blog Hop for all of us folks not going to BlogHer, that little blogger get-together happening this week.

Aside from wondering if I’ll ever find another occasion to wear a poodle skirt, thinking about a Blog Hop just brings to mind fun tunes from the 1950s.

And Grease. And . . . milkshakes.

Speaking of movies made in 1978 (that would be Grease, please keep up), I am really busy this week. See, it’s a big birthday year for me and for a lot of my friends. And because several of us have found it difficult to clear our calendars to celebrate each of these big days, Smitty and I decided to throw one big party for all of us.

I won’t go into details about all the many things I have to do between now and Friday evening. I won’t bore you with squeals of how excited I am to see all my old (but not that old!) friends. And I won’t whine about how I’m a little tiny bit nervous about mixing my high school friends with my college friends.

Nope. I’m just going to say to anyone and everyone who stops by today – Welcome! and Hello!

Robin had some advice for the Blog Hop, and she warned against being too wordy or linking to a dozen of our favorite posts. I mean, you all have a lot of blogs to check out today!

But I can’t help it. Just in case today’s visitors want to learn more about me and just in case my wonderful readers want to relive the good times, here are my links. My rule-breaking (sorry, Robin!) links about very important topics.

• A big announcement about my daughter starting to (kind of) walk.
• Rolling my eyes at my choir director (It’s a wonder I didn’t get in more trouble.)
• My favorite Mexican restaurant and the beauty of chili from a can.
• Celebrity lookalikes (I write about real serious stuff on here.)
• And a real mushy post about my husband. He’s great.

And, oh yeah, I like to share pics of my cute kiddo. Exhibit A:

Have a great day, friends. And don’t forget to hop on over to Robin’s place for the party! (And I just found another party - check out the Happy Blognerd Bash, too!)

Is that even a word?

Look how excited I was to get a desk for Christmas.
The better to play school with, of course!

I am such a nerd. And I’m okay with that. After all, if I wasn’t the proud owner of no less than four AP Stylebooks, who would my friend Kevin call when he has a grammar emergency?

Last night, for example, he called wondering how exactly to write about a range of numbers and if AP had finally changed their ruling on capital-w Web site.

[For the three of you who are wondering, numbers are still written as words when under 10 and written as numerals when 10 or higher. And AP stands firm on the hideous W.]

Lately I’ve been proofreading a lot more projects at work, so I’ve been spending even more time with my trusty AP guide. And I’ve noticed – sadly, for the first time – that my dictionary of choice should be Merriam-Webster’s.

Since my copy of Webster’s was given to me as a high school graduation gift, I’ve been using the online version for the most up-to-date pronunciations, spellings and definitions.

Little did I know just how updated the dictionary was. Until I found the list of new words, that is.

For example, “sock puppet” was added to the dictionary in 1959. But it’s on the list of New Words in 2009. Apparently this year enlarged our understanding of the puppet made of sock, though. Because a second definition has been added.

Did you know a sock puppet is also a false online identity used for deceptive purposes? I had no idea.

Not surprisingly, making the list are media favorites staycation, carbon footprint and reggaeton. Just kidding. I am not accusing the media of bringing us reggaeton, an apparently popular kind of music from Puerto Rico that “combines rap with Caribbean rhythms.”

And I’m sure you won’t be shocked to know that webisode, vlog and frenemy are now accepted parts of the English language.

But waterboarding? Did we need to resurrect that one? Weird.

So, there you have it, folks. Further proof of my nerdiness. For more, check out these oldies but goodies. Good stuff there.

Heard any new words lately?

You say I’m crazy. I got your crazy.

Next weekend, I’m going to a blogging conference called She Speaks. Technically it’s a conference for women called to write and speak in ministry, but they’ve added a blogging track. And since those are the classes I’ll take, I’m calling it a blogging conference.

I am So. Excited.

On the other hand, as I sit here at my computer, I’m wondering why I ever signed up to go in the first place. I feel so inadequate and small, and the view from my couch doesn’t help. I see blocks scattered on the floor, laundry stacked in a basket, books laying next to the bookshelf and dishes on the dining room table.

Going online to read my favorite blogs makes it even worse. Some sick, sad part of me is compelled to check my stats over and over; and then, even worse, compare them to the subscriber numbers I can see in Google Reader for other blogs.

I can’t compete. They’re cool; I’m not. They’re thin; I’m not. They have four perfect children; I don’t. They don’t yell at their kids, their houses are clean, their careers are amazing (and they’re younger than me!), they write way better than I do, their hair is prettier than mine, and on and on and on and . . .

Hold the phone. Who let the crazy out? Let’s pull it back in now.

I know I said that the Me, Myself & Lies study is hard, but it’s not been for nothing. I am learning something! Those things that I was letting spin me out of control are not true.

Well, okay, other people’s houses might be cleaner than mine. But who cares?

Because, the fact that I’m going to this conference is a total God thing. I had no idea how I was going to pay for it, and I happened to mention it in passing to my boss. My boss, who is running a company in a struggling industry in a difficult economy; the same one who said the company would pay for it as professional development! That offer came out of nowhere and just about knocked me off my seat! (Wouldn’t that have been good for the career – passing out in the CEO’s office?)

Clearly, I can’t take it lightly that I am going to this event.

After all, I remember what happened in February at Blissdom. When I got all freaked out about how cool and together and smart and funny and WHATEVER everyone else was – and missed out on a lot of fun.

Besides, it turns out that I’m not the only one freaking out a little bit. Somehow, that is so encouraging. Well, their freaking out is a little encouraging (misery loves company or something), but most inspiring is the way these women reframe their thoughts and focus on the good things God has planned for us at this conference.

• Lisa talks about clicking – or not – with new friends at conferences.
• Lysa writes about competing with and comparing ourselves to others in ministry.
• Holley shares that sometimes God has to tell her “Enough” with the insecurities and fear.
• Shelly talks about how going to this conference is out of her comfort zone.

So there. I’m not going to panic. I’m not going to wear my insecurities to the party. I’m going to pack my cutest outfits, my laptop and my new business cards, and I’m going to connect with blog friends, meet new friends and learn a whole lot about blogging and online ministries.

And I promise, when I get back, I will tell you all about the cool things I’ve learned and new friends I’ve made! Believing in myself and having a darned good time at She Speaks is going to work for me.

[As always, for more Works for Me Wednesday, visit We Are THAT Family.]

Ten {perfect} little toes.

This week’s contest at I {Heart} Faces is about feet. Pictures of feet, to be specific. Since I’m pretty sure my feet photos aren’t about to win any awards, I’m not competing. But I am going to show you some feet.

Annalyn’s feet, to be specific.

Look at those tiny toes! And those skinny legs! I took this photo in the first month or so after Annalyn came home – probably before we even arrived at her due date (since she was born 7 weeks early).

This photo is actually part of a larger one of my sweet girl sleeping. But there’s just something cute about feet that made me crop this section out.

(Then again, there’s certainly something very cute about a quietly sleeping baby!)

For more feet pictures, check out I {Heart} Faces.

Me, Myself & Lies – Week 5 Recap

Alternate title: When the Going Gets Tough . . .

This week’s study was all about remembering . . . and forgetting. The homework (though I have not completed it yet, ahem!) focused on forgetting not (in other, less complicated words: remembering) God’s benefits. And the video focused on forgetting our past and ourselves.

As with most topics in this study, those of us on last night’s chat find these instructions to be difficult. Not difficult to understand. We seem to grasp the WHY of these teachings fairly easily. It’s the HOW that is proving difficult for me – and, I think, for others doing the study.

For me, personally, it’s hard to get past the surface when discussing these matters. Because you know what? Getting past the surface and actually facing what’s in my messy, dirty, dark thought closet? It’s hard. And it hurts. And I don’t like it.

There. I said it. I don’t like this process.

Please, please don’t misunderstand me. This study and the Truth it is based on are amazing. Jennifer Rothschild, the author, is sweet and wise and wonderful – and she uses all of those characteristics to hold a mirror to my heart and then point me straight to God.

But – and make sure you hear this in the right tone of voice: whining – it’s hard!

See, what I’m learning is that I have a little issue with denial. Because I was raised – even in the middle of the Midwest – to be a good Southern girl. And a good church girl. One who answers the question, “How are you?” with an “I’m fine, thanks. And you?” every time.

That’s not to say that we don’t talk feelings in my family. On the contrary, it’s often all we do. And that, strangely combined with the Southern background and church culture of my childhood, is exactly why I would just rather not rehash all the nasty stuff that’s going on inside my heart, if you don’t mind, thank you very much.

Now, I can put on my Bible Study Face and confess all my sins and dredge up long-forgotten hymns and half-memorized Scripture to meet each situation.

But the truth? Well, the truth is, friends, that I’m not really addressing my issues.

I’m doing a lot of talking and a lot of listening to my Bible study friends. But I’m not doing much praying and certainly not enough of listening to my God.

Apparently – I either believe that I can handle all my junk on my own, or I believe that my junk isn’t that bad after all. And I think it’s a little bit of both.

One of the things that Jennifer said in the video that accompanies last week’s chapter was this: When we are full of ourselves, we dishonor God and we are the most miserable.

I think that’s the place I’m sitting squarely in. Full of myself, but standing my ground. Because taking a step outside of that spot to dig deeper into truth and reality and issues? Is scary.

There you have it: I’m scared. I don’t like this study. It’s hard. This stuff hurts.

And as scary as it was to admit all that to you, it’s even scarier to think about truly opening up my heart and really leaning on God to work through this thought closet renovation.

But I’m going to do it. Partly because I don’t like to be a quitter. And partly because I so enjoy our Monday night chats and can’t imagine dropping out on you. But also because this is what I need to do. God didn’t bring me to this study for no reason. It’s no accident that I found this book and found a group of ladies to join me in working through it.

So I’ll keep on keeping on. Will you?

[For those of you not struggling quite so desperately, I also discuss this week’s lesson at To Live Beautiful, where I ask: What tangible things do you use to remind yourself of God’s blessings in your life?]

This post is linked to What I Learned This Week.

Hooked on a feeling

Last weekend, Smitty came over. We hadn’t seen each other in a few weeks, and we had a lot to catch up on. She asked me an interesting question, one that stuck in my mind, asking over and over, until I finally had an answer.

She asked me, “What movie has truly impacted you?”

The first movie she thought of when she was asked that question was Contact. I can’t remember watching that entire movie, but I know it has some pretty deep questions and implications. So that didn’t seem strange to me.

What was strange was the fact that I just couldn’t think of a movie that’s impacted me. I like a lot of movies. I think I’ve watched a lot of movies. And I’m pretty sensitive, so I feel like I’m affected by a lot of things I watch (and read and hear and . . . well, you get the picture).

But I didn’t have an answer to her question.

The answer came the next morning, as I was driving to meet my cousin for the scrapbook retreat. And I think Smitty will like it, especially because she’s also a “scene” person.



The movie scene that impacted me – and still does – is the scene in Hook where one of the Lost Boys examines Peter, staring at and touching his face until finally, he recognizes his friend.

And he breathes, “Ohhhh. There you are, Peter.”

I don’t know what it is about that scene that gets me. But it gets me every time. I suppose it’s the notion that no matter where you go or what you do, the real you is still somewhere inside.

So now it’s your turn: What movie (or scene) has impacted you?

Saturday Review: Jim Gaffigan's King Baby

From bologna and bacon to Waffle House and bean bag chairs, Jim Gaffigan is here again to talk about the important things in life. King Baby was filmed during his stand-up tour as a follow-up to his first Comedy Central special, Beyond the Pale.

And it’s good. Good like bacon.

Seriously, I think this guy is hilarious. He’s got a dry sense of humor and deadpan delivery that cracks me up.

And then there’s the fact that his topics of choice involve being white, pudgy, lazy, “indoorsy” and what my mom calls “a good eater.” I’m not saying I identify with all those characteristics, but it’s possible that many of his jokes hit home.

I just love this guy. And so does Mark. So, in a moment of brilliance, I decided to buy King Baby, Gaffigan’s newest stand-up DVD, for Father’s Day.

It was a hit.

As DVD Talk writes, “Jim Gaffigan is a bit of a throwback, as far as today's stand-ups go . . . Gaffigan does quiet, old-fashioned observational humor, and does it without the use of profanity. Hailing from Indiana and maintaining a Midwestern point-of-view, his comic persona is that of a slightly bewildered pudgy white guy whose desires are primarily limited to comfort food and a good nap. That he has become such a phenomenally successful comic speaks to the strength of his material and his distinctive delivery; like Bob Newhart in the 60s, he's so uncool, he's cool.”

And if there’s something I can really get behind, it’s cool uncoolness.

For a taste of King Baby (hmm…there’s just something weird about that statement…), here’s a video about the most beautiful thing on earth: bacon.



And if you haven’t heard Gaffigan’s bit about Hot Pockets, please, watch it now.

Crossing the Line

UPDATE: All right, friends. I promised you my story, so here it is.

I grew earlier than most of the kids in my class. Including, most notably, the boys. But also the girls. And that height gave me an advantage when it came to the sport of basketball.

Enough of an advantage, for a couple years, to make up for chubby legs and a painfully slow run. And, oh yeah, my asthma.

But by the time I entered high school, I still had chubby slow legs and an inhaler on hand at all time. But I wasn't necessarily the tallest girl on the team.

[I know, Smitty. I was never taller than you. But for a while I was one of the tallest girls. And then I wasn't. But I still loved wearing your size 9 tall jeans in 8th grade. That one time? Remember? Yeah. I loved those jeans.]

Anyway, I played on the freshman basketball team, even though, like my height, my skills had really peaked about two years earlier. Our coach was a mean, hateful, philandering man. And I didn't like him much (if you couldn't tell).

Well, one night we were in a neighboring small town, getting our adolescent butts kicked on the court. I have memories of our coach practically screaming at us at away games; I'm not sure if that happened on this certain night or not. But either way, tensions were running high.

So when I was running my darnedest down the court - behind everyone else, remember, I was slooow - and flat out tripped over my own two feet, I shouldn't have been surprised when my so-called friends and teammates laughed hysterically.

Picture this: There I was, chubby and wheezing, trying so hard to make it from one end of that court to the other. Trying to be good. (Oh, how I tried.) And somehow, I just tripped over my Nike high tops. Falling FLAT ON MY FACE.

Oh, you know what? That's not true. First my knees slammed into the floor. Then I fell flat on my face.

Apparently, as legend goes, I tripped near one of the many painted lines on the court. This coincidence, of course, prompted my evil coach to yell - for the whole world (and the boys team) to hear: "Watch out for that line!"

Cue the hysterical laughter. Cue the years of teasing from so-called best friends. Cue the mysterious title of today's post.

Ah, high school. Bruised knees and a bruised ego. Memories. Glorious memories.

Whose idea was it, anyway, to dredge up these things?!

Right. Right. Well, anyway, that was the last year I played basketball. And that was most definitely one of my most embarrassing moments.

You like?

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A co-worker and I were discussing how weird it is that a common ice-breaker is to have each person in a newly formed group share his or her most embarrassing moment.

That's weird, right?

So how about we share ours today? Because we're not a new group here . . . c'mon! We're more like family here on this blog!

I promise - if you tell me yours, I'll tell you mine.

Actually, that's not true. I'm going to tell you my most embarrassing moment no matter what. As soon as I get more time this afternoon. But it sure would be less painful if you shared yours, too . . . I'm just saying!

She’s the voice in my head.

Mom and me at her college graduation

"Hello, beautiful baby girl."
"The world does not revolve around you."
"Read your Bible and take your vitamins."
"Dogs are done; people are finished."

From telling me how much she loves me and teaching me how the world works (or does not work, in the case of this particular example) to giving me advice for daily living and correcting my grammar, my mother is always talking to me – even when she’s nowhere to be found.

She is the voice in my head.

Just like Lucy Kelson and her mom. You know, from Two Weeks Notice? Man, I love that movie. It’s just one of those that I can watch over and over at any time.

Midway through the movie, in the scene where George meets Lucy’s parents and begins to realize why the passionate lawyer is the way she is, she says about her mother, “She’s the voice in my head.”

And this is what George, of course, says about Lucy in the end of the movie, after he’s grown a conscious and found his heart: “She’s become the voice in my head.”

I have a feeling that Lucy and I are not the only women walking around with their mother’s voice running through their heads. One thing I’m learning as I go through Me, Myself & Lies (a Bible study about self talk by Jennifer Rothschild) is that most of us have voices in our head – and that doesn’t even mean we’re crazy!

It just means that certain people in our lives tend to resonate with our hearts, whether they speak truth or lies. I’m thankful that the things running through my head – especially the words from my parents – are often truth.

I mean, think about it. Doesn’t it sound better to say that people are finished? “I am finished.” Much nicer than “I’m done.” Right?

But there are words in my heart and my head – some from people in my life, some courtesy of my own imagination – that aren’t so true.

The trick is figuring out which words are true and which aren’t – and then holding on tight to the truth and getting rid of the lies.

Whew. Heavy stuff! And not an easy task, for sure.

I know this is a constant battle for me. What about you? Who is the voice in your head?

Walk On By.

Yesterday, we had two - count 'em, two - therapy appointments. Believe it or not, neither session included a couch and memories of my childhood.

No, we had two different physical therapy appointments for Annalyn. I was actually excited for them since we've had the major stroller development.

The first appointment went well until the last 10 minutes. That would be the time when Miss Judy (as we call the therapist) decided to force Annalyn to take a few steps toward me. She even provided a sticker to motivate her. It had Hello Kitty on it.

But strangely enough, after an hour of showing off and playing with the therapy toys, and about two hours past her normal naptime, my sweet, calm daughter was not interested in taking a few more steps.

And she, ahem, let us know about it. Loudly. I'm sure you know what I mean.

So that wasn't the best end to Therapy Appointment #1. But overall, Miss Judy was appropriately impressed with Annalyn's progress.

The second appointment was a full evaluation by a state therapy program that we've heard great things about. They actually come to your house for therapy sessions, and of course, as a state program, it's a lot cheaper than the top children's hospital in our area.

It turns out that I really don't pay attention to my child. Because if I did? I'm sure I would have known how to answer questions like "How many blocks can she stack?" "Can she follow two consecutive commands?" "Can she match an object to its picture?"

By the end of that appointment, I felt like I didn't even know what "object" and "picture" even meant anymore!

Thankfully, I didn't have to reflect long when asked, "Does she share well? Take turns with toys?"

Ummm, not so much.

Anyway, the good news and bad news is that Annalyn does qualify for their services. Good, because I'm anxious (to say the least) for this walking progress to continue. Bad, because the eval confirms that she is, indeed, very far behind in her development.

On the bright side, her cognitive development is above average. As if I needed a test to tell me that!

(C'mon. I'm telling you about how my 20-month-old can't walk. Let me talk about how smart she is for a second at least!)

Anyway. Therapy Day went well. And in just over a day, I will have the privilege of hearing a legend sing. At least that's what I'm told. Leroy Van Dyke is known for, among many other things, what Billboard magazine calls "the biggest country single of all time": Walk on By.

I know it's going to be a fun concert. But the thing is . . . I don't actually know this song. I don't think it's the same as this Walk on By. And it's definitely not this Chicago song that I keep thinking of, which apparently does not even share the song's name.

So this week, from pushing a baby stroller named "Beep Beep" to listening to an 80-something-year-old man sing the Auctioneer Song, walking on by works for me.

What I Learned from Summer Vacation

Why do I feel like I should be sitting in a classroom with my fading tanned legs sticking to a hard plastic chair as I type that? Oh, yeah, maybe because learning from a vacation is that ultimate essay prompt that takes most of us back to middle school.

Thankfully this post does not include acne, big bangs or angst-ridden crushes on boys six inches shorter than me.

Anyway.

After traveling out of town for an entire week and taking a few days to recuperate reflect, I’ve come up with a few insights into myself, my child and the world.

Yup. I’m deep that way.

1. As much as I tell myself I’m over my worry problem, really, it’s just around the corner, waiting to consume me. After my parents picked up Annalyn, I was knocked over by anxiety. The combination of leaving my daughter for four days and knowing that she would be flying on a plane without me was just too much.
2. Praying and leaning on Jesus is still the answer to my worry problem.
3. Taking motion sickness medicine (at least the over-the-counter kind) does not keep me from feeling nauseous when flying. It turns out reading SkyMall is the only way to distract me from the motion sickness.
4. Mark and I are mountain people, not beach people. Please don’t get me wrong! We are so very thankful for our vacation, and we had a great time. And the ocean? Even on a rainy day, it is beautiful. But I think most people tend to enjoy and appreciate either the beach or the mountains – and we’re the put on sturdy shoes and hike up a trail kind instead of the fling off the flip flops and walk in rocky sand kind.
5. I could have been a dolphin trainer. Seriously. I realize an overweight Midwestern girl who just admitted she prefers the mountains may not be who you think of when you think “dolphin trainer.” But not too many years ago (okay, many years ago), I thought a lot about pursuing a career in training dolphins for children’s therapy. Since I don’t enjoy the science, though, I assumed that career path was not for me. Turns out that having a psychology degree qualifies a person to train dolphins, though. Psychology, as in the subject I once majored in and actually did minor in. I don’t think I still want to be a dolphin trainer, but this realization kinda, sorta rocked my world.
6. Cheese grits are good stuff. (This is less something I learned on vacation and more something I knew but had forgotten.)
7. I am the only person in my family without an unlimited texting plan. Therefore, I am the only one whose phone bill will be unusually high next month, since my brother and mom decided texting was the easiest way to communicate between our hotel rooms.
8. Traveling with three people means a lot of luggage. And when one of those people is too little to carry her own suitcase and diaper bag? Well, let’s just say we did not have enough hands in the airport! (Three suitcases, three tote bags, one purse, one stroller, one car seat – and no, we cannot juggle.)
9. I love the timber industry. Okay, not really. But I love seeing the tall, skinny pines lined up in perfect rows. Even though I am fully aware that companies who make paper or something have planted those trees, I like looking at those trees and imagining that God is just as concerned with straight lines as I am.
10. It does not matter how clean you leave your house and how often your friend checks on your cats. If you neglect them for 8 days, they will pee on your kitchen counter.

What have you learned lately? This post is linked to OhAmanda’s Top Ten Tuesday and Musings of a Housewife’s What I Learned This Week.

Me, Myself & Lies Recap – Week 4

I searched for a photo of a group hug, because I thought that illustrated tonight's chat. When I found this photo of beautiful little girls, holding hands and dancing, well, I thought that it might just be the perfect picture of how God sees us. What do you think?

Thanks to all the ladies who joined us tonight. What a great conversation we had!! I know a couple of you mentioned looking forward to my recap, but to be honest, I’m still processing a lot of what we talked about, so I’ll keep this brief.

First, if you’re just now joining us, you can read all the posts about our online study of Me, Myself & Lies (including weekly recaps). We’ve got a great group of ladies going through the book and discussing it each week, and we are always open to anyone who wants to jump in.

To purchase the book, you can get it at your local Lifeway store or on the Lifeway website. And if you’d like to download each week’s video (there is a cost), you can also get that on the Lifeway site. And if you have the book but not the videos, you can still get the answers for the last page of each chapter by downloading the (FREE) listening guide answers.

As for tonight’s discussion – wow. On one hand, it’s clearly no accident (duh!) that we are studying this topic. As we laughed about during the chat – all God’s women got issues, and this group is not immune! But on the other hand, these Monday night chats are really turning into a great, supportive environment where we can come and work through the issues that our study is addressing.

Thank you to the women who are participating. You are awesome, and I just love you!

One of the first things we discussed is that most of us are behind in the homework. Part of this (at least for me) is due to life’s circumstances and busy summers. But most of the reason is actually that this study is so dense, so full of material and truth to chew on, that it takes longer than just one day to process one lesson.

And I think that’s okay.

We talked about a couple different topics tonight. Rather than repeat all our words verbatim, I’m going to throw out a few bullets here and ask that everyone join in the discussion in the comments.

• Dealing with self-talk issues is overwhelming and, at times, feels impossible.
• But, we know that we can do all things with God. And it’s less overwhelming if we take this growing and changing process one day (or baby step) at a time.
• God has made each of us, giving us individual personalities. Some of us are more passionate and fiery than others – but we all need to make sure that “fire” is the righteous kind of passion God wants.
• We must be alert, guarding our souls (thought closets) to keep out the negative stuff.
• If we don’t pay attention, we might not even notice the bad stuff that’s in there. But the scary thing is – even if we don’t know it, everyone around us can see it.
• This is why we need a true accountability partner – something that none of us in tonight’s chat have at the moment. Our prayer this week is that God will lead each of us to a person who will support and encourage us in our walk with God. And as we discussed, we have to remember that accountability is serious business and we shouldn’t jump into a relationship without seeking God’s guidance.
• Questions that accountability partners could ask (per the study video): What do you see in my life that encourages you? What do you see in my life that you’d like to caution me about? Is there anything else you’d like to tell me?
• Week 4 talks about speaking peace to ourselves. Most of us on the chat admitted that we are no good at that! So rather than dwell on that as a failing, we agreed to search the Scripture this week and find a verse that will help us speak peace.
• We also talked briefly about how we present ourselves to the world as having it together, being happy, being perfect – both online and offline – and how that’s hurting everyone. Being authentic will not only free us to be ourselves and experience true growth and real intimacy, but it will also allow our friends to have perspective and be authentic themselves.

Do you have an accountability partner? Does trying to work through your issues get overwhelming? How do you speak peace to your soul?

I do not have an accountability partner, and to be honest, I’m scared to open myself up to someone like that. Working through my issues is always overwhelming, and my typical reaction is denial. I just push the issues down – with food, with TV, with internet, with talking – and pretend like they’re not there. And speaking peace? Well, sometimes I can do this – remembering truth and reciting scripture. But more often, I am much better at speaking fire and getting myself all riled up. So, I’m going to be finding a verse this week to help me calm down and listen to God and accept His peace.

What about you?

Hello, Monday. How did you get here so fast?

I realize it would be better to write, “How did you get here so quickly?” but I really felt like saying fast.

How was your weekend? Mine was busy, so as usual, I don’t have much blog brilliance for you this morning. Let’s just go with a list . . .

• First, we will have a live chat tonight at 8 p.m. CST to discuss Me, Myself & Lies. ALL are welcome, and you’re welcome no matter where you are in the study. Let's get back to cleaning out our thought closets!
• This weekend's scrapbooking retreat was a success. I finished 26 pages, or 13 layouts. Oh, all right, fine. So I still need to go back and journal and fancy them up, but the pictures are slapped down onto pretty paper. So I still call that a success!
• And wow, the facility we were at was fantastic! I’ve done a handful of scrapping weekends, and this place was by far the best I’ve been to. If you live around these parts and like to scrapbook (or craft something – it’s for quilters, cardmakers, seamstresses, anyone!), I highly suggest you check out Maple Memories in McPherson.
• Since I consider chips and salsa to be our fifth food group, it’s no wonder Annalyn also appreciates the salt and the spice. But it always cracks me up just how much she loves chips and salsa – or, as she was calling them last night, “bips and dotdot.”
• And speaking of my baby girl – we’ve had a major development. Starting on Friday night – and huge thanks to her Aunt Smitty – Annalyn started walking behind her baby stroller. She even let Smitty hold her hands and walk her around the house – something she’s refused (complete with going limp, flailing around fits) to do with us for these last 8 months. Then on Saturday morning, she decided that she actually enjoyed walking behind her “beep beep strawer” (that’s the stroller, to those of you who don’t speak toddler) and hasn’t stopped since. Honestly, after months of frustration, this feels like a miracle. Especially since it’s happened just days before we go back to the physical therapist to see if she’s made any progress!
• Last – and probably least – I had a 3-hour drive between the scrapbooking retreat and my house. And after several nights in a row of not nearly enough sleep, I needed help. Of course that included a gigantic Coke from McDonald’s, but I also found a burst of energy by listening to my Mamma Mia soundtrack. I just love that movie.

And that’s all. How’s your Monday? Manic? Monotonous? Mild? Moving? Something that doesn’t start with “m” or make me think of an 80s song?

Photo of bips and dotdot by Photo Mojo.

Saturday Review: Sunset Beach by Trish Perry

Sonny Miller is tired of not knowing who she is. Soon she’ll begin graduate school to earn her masters in Psychology. But how can she counsel future clients about their identities when she isn’t even sure about her own? To that end she has cooked up a little meeting at a certain beach house in San Diego.

Sonny’s mother, classical soprano Teresa Miller, isn’t aware she’s about to be reunited at the beach house with her sister, Melanie Hines, after 25 years of estrangement. And Sonny isn’t aware her mother has invited a surprise guest of her own. Russian adoptee, Irina Petrova, finds herself dragged along on a trip so tumultuous she summons her handsome concert violinist brother for moral support.

The four women converge on the funky little beach house in San Diego, each with her own disappointments and hopes about family, identity, and love. For Sonny, the trip reveals all she expected and more than she ever dreamed.

When I signed up to review Sunset Beach by Trish Perry, I was excited because I’d read two other books by her and loved them. I remember laughing out loud more than once while reading them. And you know how I like the funny.

When I received the book in the mail, I started wondering if it would be as good. After all, the cover art may not be worse than Perry’s earlier books, but it was certainly different. And not really my style, to be honest.

Then I started reading the book. And I noticed that the author was using multiple points of view (POV), a writing style that I’ve been learning about in my never-ending (seriously, who knew I had so much to learn?) research into the world of writing, editing and publishing.

And I decided I didn’t like multiple POVs.

But I kept plugging along, partly because I’d signed up to read the book and couldn’t back out on that commitment, partly because I’m weird that way and just can’t stop reading a book in the middle.

I’m so glad I kept reading. Eventually, I realized that the only reason I was stuck on the different points of view was because I was seeing the story from the perspective of three different women – whereas the books I normally read focus on a man and a woman. (Yes, I like romance. Sue me.) Once I got that figured out, I felt much more comfortable.

Plus, I decided that I’m nowhere near an editing expert yet, so I’d better leave the point of view critiquing to the experts.

To sum up my long story, I liked Sunset Beach. I think certain Iowan friends – and those who love them – would like it because despite the duplicitous premise of the book’s plot, the characters were actually upfront and forthright with each other. At least, more so than characters are in most books in this genre.

If you’d like to get your own copy of Sunset Beach by Trish Perry, you’re in luck. It came out last month, and you can get it at your local Amazon store. (Just kidding. I know Amazon isn’t local. Ha!)

And in case you’d like to read other books by Trish Perry – funny ones with sweet stories – check out Too Good to Be True and The Guy I’m Not Dating.

Now, because I’m a giver, here are a few questions answered by Ms. Trish Perry herself. (And for more information about Trish, visit her website!)

If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?

Well, hands down, I’d have to be able to teleport. Frankly, I’d travel a lot more if it weren’t for airports! I would have chosen the superpower of flying, but who wants to carry all that luggage in the air? If I could teleport, I could have my luggage in my circle of teleportability (you have heard of those, yes?), and it would teleport with me, free of luggage searches and additional-baggage fees.

What has God been teaching you lately?

I’ve been blown away by how clearly He forgives my weaknesses. Things have occurred in my life over the past 18 months for which (right or wrong) I carried a burden of guilt. You know, that feeling of “how did I contribute to this mess?” Yet He has blessed me so abundantly in the midst of my feelings of conviction, that He amazes me daily with His obvious love. The blessings keep me humbly aware of how much I need Him. And they instill in me such a strong desire to serve Him and to follow His guidance and will.

What part of the writing process do you enjoy the most?

I love writing dialogue. What a control freak’s dream, to have control over what everyone says, including the antagonist. If only life were that easy, LOL! But truly, sometimes a scene simply shapes itself right before my eyes when the characters are engaged in dialogue. I don’t know quite what will be expressed sometimes, and I love it when it flows even faster than I seem to be able to think it.

When you write do you generally know where you’re headed or are you sometimes as surprised as your characters about the way things end?

There is always surprise, no matter how well I plan out a book’s progress. I was just talking with my editor about that the other day, the fact that the initial summary I write might change a bit as events unfold around my protagonist. I think that’s happened with every book I’ve written. I typically write a summary, which tells me generally where the story will go, and then I write a sentence or two per chapter idea, and then I start hammering away on Chapter One. As I write actual chapters, the events between “Once upon a time” and “The End” evolve in more significant ways than I expected in the first place. It’s an exciting process!

What would you say to someone who wants to become a published author?

Give the endeavor to God first. And daily. When doubts arise (and they will), you must be able to fall back on the knowledge that your efforts are for Him. And know that He will never show you the way by crushing your efforts with rejection and desolation. If He wants you to do something other than writing, He’ll lovingly draw you to that other endeavor.
That said, take all the practical steps to learn the craft and the business. Read (both how-to’s and novels), write, network, and submit. Over and over again.

Where did you get the idea for the book?

The setting (the funky little house on Mission Beach) and time frame (one or two weeks’ time) were already established for me by my publisher. All of the books in The Beach House series fall within those parameters. But the characters and their stories formulated over time. First I dreamed up Sonny—a young woman who had lived her entire life devoid of details about her family background, thanks to her secretive mother. Sonny had reached a point where she wanted to take control of her own life. Her mother was the barrier to that, so Sonny needed to both go around her mother and barrel headlong towards her. The hidden details about Sonny’s past arose as I created each new character. Even though my own family is close and forthcoming about our family history, there have always been fuzzy areas about which I’ve wanted to know more. I imagined how difficult it would be if your entire family history were fuzzy. I know I’d be compelled to act as Sonny did.

What are the major themes of the book?

My books always end up having a broad overall theme of the importance of seeking God’s guidance in everything. That’s never been deliberate—that’s just the way my stories work out. But for Sunset Beach, the most important theme entails our personal identities and how we determine them. Upon whom, or what, do we base our beliefs about who we are, what we’re worth, what our purpose in life is? A subtheme in the book has to do with the struggle to approach romance and passion appropriately. I think that’s a tough one for every single person I know, and it brings us right back to that whole seeking-God’s-guidance-in-everything theme.

What do you hope readers will take away from your book?

First, I hope they’ll find the book entertaining. I want them to enjoy Sonny’s journey and the way her discoveries uncover secrets and feelings for the people around her. I hope they’ll be amused, but only when I mean them to be! On a grander scale, I hope readers will be touched by the whole issue of personal identity and how God factors into that. I never want to write a preachy book—but I certainly enjoy hearing when my books are inspiring. My prayer before every book I write is that God will give me the story someone somewhere needs to read in order to feel more of what He wants them to feel. Then I leave it up to Him.

Disclosure: I received my copy of this book free from the publisher, as part of a project with The Blog Tour Spot. However, for whatever it’s worth, I would have read it anyway, since I’ve read this author before and liked her. (Of course, I would have checked it out from the library, so I suppose that doesn’t really help the publisher anyway.)

I'm late, I'm late, for a very important date!

More specifically, I've taken procrastination way too far this time. And put off printing photos of Annalyn way too long.

I'm going to a scrapbooking retreat with my cousin Sarah this weekend, and I haven't printed a single picture since October.

Nine months ago.

And apparently, sorting through hundreds of photos, editing them and sending them to print is not the easiest thing to accomplish the week after a week-long vacation.

All that to say . . . I need to spend my Thursday night blogging time on this "little" project. So how about we take a litlte poll in the meantime?

How do you print your photos? Every month? Once a year? On your printer at home? With an online service like Shutterfly or Snapfish? At the drugstore or scrapbooking shop? Tell me - obviously my system isn't working so well!

Did you say photos? Vacation photos?

Well, since you asked.

Seriously, I found out after posting the link to Flickr that you have to sign in with a Yahoo account. And since not everyone has that, I figured I'd better put the pictures on here.

I wouldn't want you all to revolt. Or protest. Or whine. Oh, please don't whine as you beg for just a peek at my 367 vacation pictures.

Brace yourself. Here they come. (A few dozen. Not 367. I promise.)

A flamingo was just waking up as we entered Sea World on Monday.

I don't remember where this was in Sea World. But it sure was purty.

Yay! The dolphin show! Or, as we found it to be: the dolphin and people and birds show. Seriously, we didn't expect the acrobats and birds, but they were all incredible (if a tad bit cheesy).

Would you laugh if I told you that I cried during the Shamu show? Because, um, I totally did. Mark mocked the sappy "Believe" theme, and I can't deny that it was a bit over the top. But I'm a sucker for sap, I guess. (Oh, please, who am I kidding? This is not news.)

On a side note, the Shamu show is also where we thought we lost our video camera. When we went to pack the camera on Wednesday, we couldn't find it anywhere. We just knew that it had fallen out of my purse (stupid hobo bag) or been snatched. I sat on hold with Sea World for half an hour, only to learn that no, nobody had turned our camera into Lost & Found. Thankfully (thank you, God!), it was just buried in the backpack. Still not sure how it got there . . . but I don't even care. I'm just so glad our camera (and videos of Annalyn) didn't disappear.

Back to the pics.

What, you thought I went to Florida to take pictures of palm trees?

My friend Kevin told me about Celebration, Florida, a planned town built by Disney. Unfortunately, we planned to check it out on our beach day. The one where it rained a lot. What we saw from the car, though, was beautiful.

I think this is self-explanatory? Unless, like me, you don't know what Downtown Disney is. So, I guess I should explain after all. Just in case. Downtown Disney is essentially an outdoor Disney mall. It's a strip of stores and restaurants, and it may or may not include Pleasure Island. I wasn't quite sure. But I am sure that it was a lot of fun. We didn't actually go to any of the Disney parks, so I was glad to get a little bit of time in the world of Mickey. (After all, we needed to buy a Mickey shirt for Annalyn somewhere!)

This would probably be a good time to tell you about the ferry adventure we had on the way home from Downtown Disney. But . . . no. I think I'll save that one for later.

Do you see this? My brownie sundae? It was ridiculous. That's about all I can say about it. We tried to eat a light dinner (this was an unsuccessful venture, since we ate dinner at a delicious pizzeria), because we'd heard about Ghiradelli's ice cream shop at Downtown Disney. Don't worry - we walked off at least a tenth of the calories we ingested as we shopped. But it was sooo worth it!

I was real excited to visit the Lego Store. I'm not sure why. It was pretty cool. But I'll admit: we were darned tired by the time we reached it. So I snapped a few (a lot) photos, and we headed home.

Well, we tried to head home. But like I said, I'll tell you that story later.

More Legos.

I have never wished more that I had a good camera phone with e-mail capabilities. Because I would have Twitpic-ed this for sure. As this motorcycle passed us, I noticed the couple was not wearing helmets. But before I could even open my mouth to start my usual rant about stupidity and helmet laws and all that, I saw the milk crate on the back of the bike. With a DOG in it. A dog! And that dog didn't have a helmet. Or a seat belt. Or anything to keep it safe! I was appalled! I wanted to call PETA! Or the police! Or the Ghostbusters!

But instead, I asked Mark to speed up a little so I could take a picture.

On Tuesday, we drove to Clearwater. I'd read all about the incredible sunsets, the white sand, the dolphin cruises. What I didn't read about was the thunderstorm that covered most of Florida that day. We kept hoping that we'd outrun the storm, and for a couple hours, we did. But it never really got sunny, and halfway through our walk on the beach, it started raining again.

Fortunately, I was prepared. With a big black umbrella in my purse. I'm not sure who looked more silly - Mark, trying to do his best Baywatch run back to the car, or me, sauntering along the sand, proudly holding my umbrella with a broken spoke.

But you know what? We still had fun. We drove down the coast (or was it up? I forget.) and found a great Italian restaurant in Tampa and overall, had a great day.

The Gulf in Clearwater. Can you see the sun shining? Wayyy back in the corner there?

Our little bathing beauty.

On Thursday, we drove north to meet my parents, my brother and sister-in-law, and our sweet baby who we hadn't seen in four days. And I'm not quite sure who was more excited - her or us!

The second we set her down on the sand (after a picnic lunch and lots of sunscreen for her and me - except my back, which is officially peeling today), she plopped down on the towel and popped that leg up in the air like some sort of beach model.

I have no idea where she learned such a thing.

Annalyn was excited to see us, but she loved spending so much time with her A-ee and Bompa (otherwise known as Allie and Grandpa). I think she's gone into withdrawal since we came home!

What is this? (I promise, several of us were within arm's reach. I just cropped us out.)

Once she got used to the warm ocean water and the gritty sand, Annalyn was perfectly happy to sit in the ocean and let the water rush over her as she played with her bucket.

So happy that she pitched quite a fit when it was time to go. But who wants to talk about that?

After all, who would believe this happy girl would throw a fit?

Oh, how I wish I'd had my camera handy when that happened, though. My sweet daughter, who hasn't sucked her thumb or pacifier for about 18 months, curled up in the fetal position, stuck her thumb in her mouth and sobbed her little heart out.

All because I didn't want her to get sunburned.

(Did I mention that I forgot to put sunscreen on my back that day? And that I had to go buy a loofah on a stick at Target today?)

Ahem.

Annalyn would not tolerate the very cute and comfy (cloth) floaties we bought specifically for this trip. She did, however, put up with the baby floating ring that - as we discovered a couple days later - was built for babies a few pounds lighter than her.

For a baby who loves taking baths, she wasn't all that impressed with the swimming pool. She was a little more energetic the day we swam in the afternoon, but the morning swims? Not so exciting, I suppose.

Long story short, my great uncle - who we went to visit - ended up in the hospital on Friday. So while my parents spent the afternoon visiting him, we went with my brother and sister-in-law to visit the only plantation open to the public in Thomas County: Pebble Hill.

It was beautiful, and even though it was blazing hot that day, we had the chance to take some great pictures on the grounds. (Kids under 6 weren't allowed in the main house, so we wandered around outside - and enjoyed the air conditioned snack shop - while James and Lauren toured the house.)

When my mom called the hospital to find out what was going on with my uncle, she found out that the lady working the information desk was from Pavo, the same small town my great-grandad (my mom's grandad) was from. As a matter of fact, she taught at the elementary school - and taught my aunt way back in the day. Later that afternoon, when Mom and Dad were at the hospital and trying to track down my uncle, the security guard went the extra yard to find him because he knew him, too.

So, as we chatted with the info guy at the plantation while we waited for James and Lauren to finish their tour, I thought I'd give it a shot. I told Mr. Taylor how we were in town visiting my great-uncle and great-aunt, but that my uncle had gotten sick and went to the hospital. I told him their names, and he said, "Oh, yeah! We're in a club together. We went on tours together!" Turns out "a club" was Kiwanis Club, and tours had something to do with their church. So as we waited and finally stopped sweating, we swapped stories about who in our family and his cheats while playing cards.

"Small world" deosn't even begin to describe that place.

We didn't see a sign saying not to climb on the ancient carriages. So we took full advantage of the old-fashioned photo opp.

"Are you finished taking pictures yet?"

Sorry, baby, no.

This photo was taken at the plantation, not on the plane we took home. But if you can imagine taking this face, adding some hysteria and lots of ear-splitting screams? Well, then you might be close to imagining what the passengers of our TINY (34 passenger) plane between Tallahassee and Memphis endured.

Reportedly, Annalyn was an angel for my parents on the flight down. And I am so thankful. Honestly, I really had to pray myself down from overwhelming anxiety about the whole leaving my daughter and she's going to fly without me thing.

But my, oh my, I probably should have spent some of that time praying for our flight home. Because the first hour of the first flight? Complete torture - for Annalyn, for us, for the other passengers and for the kind flight attendant.

It was so bad the flight attendant moved us from the back of the plane to the front. It was so bad that not only was my body covered in sweat (I get sick when flying and did I mention the turbulence?), but I also ended up sobbing myself. It was so bad that the pilots could hear her through the door and sent ear plugs back for the other passengers.

It was bad.

But we survived. And I promise you, we will nev-er fly with a toddler again, barring any life and death emergencies, of course.

And that, is the end of my vacation photo show. Hope you enjoyed it. I know I did!

And now that I see Jill is saying she loves vacation (as I do, obviously), I'm linking up to her. Go check out Things I Love Thursday!