My closet is occasionally organized and neat.But somehow, my clothes end up all over the place . . . not so organized.
What does your closet look like?
Wow. What a great first meeting we had last night! Debbie, Hip Mama and Chelleybutton joined me to discuss self talk, negative thoughts and giving ourselves a thought closet makeover.
I’ll include the highlights of our discussion here; please add to what we have in the comments!
[And please remember: ANYONE is welcome to join this study and this conversation at ANY TIME. Come one, come all!]
Think about your closet. Is it perfectly organized, with matching hangers? Are all your long-sleeved shirts hanging together, right above all your shoes lined up in neat rows? Or do you have piles of clothes strewn about, with a pile of boots and flip flops fighting with belts, purses and random boxes?
Jennifer Rothschild, author of Me, Myself & Lies, draws a beautiful analogy between our clothes closet and our minds. She says that everything we’ve ever said to ourselves over the years makes up our thought closets. And those thoughts are now wardrobing – or covering – our lives.
Whew. I’m not sure which is heavier. The fact that I actually said “strewn about” with a straight face, or the fact that the junk I say to myself is coloring how I live. Right – what do you think?
Jennifer points out that if we heard someone else talking to another person the way we talk to ourselves, we’d be upset! But she also acknowledges that these negative thoughts have become a habit. They’ve become normal.
Or, as she puts it: “Normal. Like cancer.”
Do you have this problem? Do you find yourself calling yourself names? I do.
I call myself stupid. Fat. Lazy. Sometimes all at once! And I’m ready for what Jennifer calls a thought closet makeover.
Debbie, Hip Mama and Chelleybutton pointed out that we’ve got to start replacing these negative thoughts – whatever yours look and sound like – with positive ones. With God’s word. With His truth.
The scary thing is that each person has a constant inner dialogue containing anywhere from 150-300 words each minute! And as Jennifer points out, if you don’t control your thoughts, your thoughts will control you. She says that the only way to gain a little control over your thoughts is to monitor what you tell yourself.
All of this made me think of Philippians 4:8 – “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
And Debbie reminded us of 2 Timothy 1:7 – “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”
Jennifer describes our thought closet as being organized into six different shelves or bins. Strangely enough, they spell the word “closet.”
C = cares and concerns. Our worries, the what-ifs.
L = likes and dislikes. Our personality and preferences.
O = objectives and goals. Our dreams, plans, to-do lists, etc.
S = secrets. The things we don’t let anyone see.
E = eternity. As it says in Ecclesiastes 3, God has placed eternity in our hearts.
T = treasures. The people, memories and priorities that are most precious to us.
Which of these areas needs the most help in your closet?
I’m not sure where all my issues fit yet, but I’m looking forward to figuring out how to turn the lies I’ve believed and told into redeeming truth. Because as Jennifer reminds us, every wrong word and every life that is spoken can be redeemed by God!
This week, we’ll do the daily study in the member book. If you haven’t gotten your copy yet, I suggest calling the Lifeway store nearest you and picking one up soon. We’ll discuss this first chapter next week.
An accompanying video is available on the Lifeway website, and that’s where I’ve pulled a lot of Jennifer’s insight from for last night’s discussion and today’s post. However, each video costs $5, so you absolutely don’t have to download them. The listening guides in the book have answers that you can get from the videos . . . or online. And I just know we’ll have plenty to talk about from the homework.
I am looking forward to diving into this study, getting to know some phenomenal women better and learning what truths God has to speak to my heart. Join us each Monday night at 8 pm CST for a live chat or each Tuesday for a recap post and comments.
be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.
(Psalm 19:14)
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"If you don’t control your thoughts, your thoughts will control you"… I'm so guilty of this. I definitely need a makeover! (Btw, this whole 'makeover' theme makes me think of Clueless: "I decided I needed a complete make-over, except this time I'd make-over my soul." Too cheesy? Sorry. But you know how I like to draw parallels between movies and real life:) And on that note, I should probably get started reading, huh?
Thanks again for leading the study! :) I'm looking forward to it — hopefully it will at least put a dent in my overflowing negative thought closet. And I'm excited about getting to know the women in the study too — without ever having to worry about what to wear or whether to bring a treat. ;)
Oh, but just one warning to anyone who hasn't joined the live chat yet: Be careful when using emoticons. The big grin emoticon (:D or :-D) shows up as a grimace, which can be sort of awkward in certain contexts… :)
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Love the idea of a thought closet. I talk to myself all the time and would love those words to be positive and Christ-honoring.
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Really enjoyed our chat last night…my friend might be joining us next week. :)
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Chelley…were you using "my" face??? :-D
Unfortunately I will only be able to participate in the Tuesday blog recap…8 CST is dinnertime in our household (6:00 AZ time :-D)…you don't mess with dinner!
"if we heard someone else talking to another person the way we talk to ourselves, we’d be upset!" I've heard that before…makes me wonder if I've done this study before–I've done quite a few different studies over the years! I'll have to double-check my files…
Another really good study is "Beauty and the Pig" by Doorposts…in case someone wants to do ANOTHER study on their own about godly beauty. It's quite funny, but very insightful.
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Okay…I just went and checked out an excerpt online (we did this study 2 years ago…) and it isn't funny…the woman LEADING the group was hilarious, but the study itself isn't funny–but still VERY insightful! :-D
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Chelley – you know I love comparisons to movies! :)
HipMama – awesome! She's definitely welcome!
HM – This study is brand new this year, but based on a book that came out (I think) last year.
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Wow! That sounds like a really awesome study. I was seeing a lot of stuff that I struggle with in my own mental closet just reading through this post. I am looking forward to hearing more and maybe I can get a hold of the actual book, we'll see.
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I didn't buy the book since I'm starting a new Bible study June 17th, but I tried to tune in to the chat anyway last night. Unfortunately I was thinking you were one hour ahead, but duh, it's two hours, so I missed you. Tomorrow I'm running some errands and I'm going to look for the book. Maybe, just maybe, I can actually do two different studies at once.
I had a really weird thought though while reading your post… Negative talk is normal for me and I'm not quite sure I even want to give it up. Who wants to analyze that?
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Messy Mom – you are welcome to join in anytime!
Brenda, I hope you'll join in, even if you decide not to do the actual study right now. And I can't analyze your issue, because I have the same one. I've been thinking, as I've been doing the homework this week, that a lot of the "negative" things I say to myself are true. So why would I need to stop saying them?
Don't worry – I recognize that this isn't good or healthy or God-honoring. But it's what I struggle with…
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Ooh, that's good, Brenda (good as in a good point; probably not good as in beneficial;) — you should definitely join. :) (oh, that sounds bad — I'm not saying you should join b/c you need the help, but b/c I think you probably have lots more good points:)
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Chelley, Lol! Yes, I have many issues that could possibly be revealed. Are you sure you want that? Just kiddin'. :)
"My name is Brenda and I'm a negative talker". How's that for a start to the group?
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Brenda – that's a GREAT start to the group. :)
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